I fucking hate Justin Long. He has done his best to ruin past comedies such as Dodgeball, Waiting, and most shameful, "Accepted". He is a little arrogant prick whose sarcasm is anti-funny. He wears short sleeved button down shirts (which is the staple of the GDIs wardrobe). He stars in those smarmy MAC commercials that have never been funny. Basically, nothing this person does is funny. Yet people still hire this little fucktard to be in their movies. Let's analyze his dooshiest elements of "Accepted".
1) Makes roofie jokes- "Hey (Frat dude's name). Meet my friend "Rejection". She's a bitch. But you can't roofie her, so you won't like her". Fuck you dirtbag. GDIs roofie chicks more than frat dudes. They scam on chicks by pretending to be their friends, but in the back of his mind, he wants to make her lick his asshole.
2) Insinuates that all frats are racist and completely intolerant- Listen here, dickeater. My frat was the first fraternity to accept people from all walks of life, no matter their race or religion. Meanwhile, little pussies like Justin Long start clubs that discriminate based on these previously mentioned criteria. Fuck you again, Justin Long.
3) Eats his brownie like its an apple- As this smug shiteater is talking to the frat dudes, he is sitting there, chewing with his mouth open, chocolate on his teeth, and smacking his lips. This guy is supposed to be the protagonist? I fucking hate this asshole. How can anybody like this obnoxious prick?
4) Sings Blitzkrieg Bop by the Ramones- As he performs, he flops around on stage like a retard and completely butchers the song. He is not cool. He is a complete and utter tool box.
Look, the movie is all about accepting people for who they are and about how poor it feels to be rejected. No shit, assholes. Rejection sucks. That's why people do their best to avoid it. Otherwise, there would be no way to differentiate the degenerates and miscreants from those people in society who deserve our admiration. People get rejected all the time, but it's only the losers like Justin Long who dwell on it and blame the rest of the world for their own failure.
Fuck you Justin Long. I Fucking hate you. I will never pay a cent to see you in any movie ever again. And if you ever come to my city, I hope I run into you. When I do, I will tell you to your face what a GDI piece of dogshit you are.
... That felt good.
Sunday, September 16, 2007
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